When Being A Black Woman Isn't Good Enough

Two black young men (about 18-25), are in a neighborhood watch group program that pays them to stand on particular corners in Harlem for 1-2 hours a day. They see a female (let's call her Kim) that they know past by, the talk about how big her butt is, her family and then they discuss someone she knows. (Names used are fictional, they are only to facilitate the story. Also most of the curse words are omitted and the grammar is corrected for audience purposes)

Guy 1: You remember Sarah?? One of Kim's family members?

Guy 2: Yeah. What about her??

Guy 1: She got a good job and she dresses nice

Guy 2: Yup, her gear be on point

Guy 1: But I don't like her because she think that just because she has a good job, she dresses nice and got her stuff together she can't talk to nobody

Guy 2: Yeah I can't talk to black girls like that, they be thinking that they better than everybody. Making a N***** work

Guy 1: Exactly, they be making us do some crazy things just to be with them. It's not even that serious. They see a N***** like me and they don't talk to me, forget you then

Guy 2: Yup, they be fronting on N****** because they got dough and because we making less than them

Guy 1: That's why I like messing with white girls

Guy 2: They down for EVERYTHING

Guy 1: And a N***** don't have to work so hard.

Guy 2: Right

Guy 1: Then the black girls always complain about us dating white girls. Then B**** stop making things so difficult and talk to a N*****

I witnessed this conversation in a restaurant last week and it bothered me that these black "men" were talking bad about a black woman because she was trying to do better for herself. I don't want to rant and give a biased view but I will love to get feedback on this matter. Comment and leave your opinions about this situation below. Who do you think was right the girl or the guys?

Signed,

An Average Yet Disappointed New Yorker

AvgNYer@gmail.

A DAMN SHAME

After a long grueling day at work, I had planned to come home and go straight to sleep but this post NEEDS to be written. I was all for a short FB status but I decided against it so I wouldn't limit myself in my rant. I am going to write what I heard someone saying on the B46 in Brooklyn and you judge for yourself.

So this guy (55-70 years old) is seated in the back of the bus on his cellphone and says very loudly:

 "What in the world. All these colored folk are coming on the bus. WOW these colored folks are coming on the bus by the thousands. These colored folks ain't stopping, now I feel Claustrophobic"


I couldn't believe my ears and I guess the person on the other end of the line couldn't either because they hung up. So this same guy sees a man (in his twenties) dressed in a suit, shaking his head so he turns to him and says:

"Why you shaking your head BOI. Its true they colored but it would be different it I called them Negroes"

So the young guy answers in disbelief and says:

"I was born after the 1980s so I guess we think differently"


I guess this old man though he was Kevin Hart and he was the best thing since sliced bread so he kept going. His next victim was a man about his age coming on the bus with a cane. So he shouts from the back of the bus to the front and says:

"Make room for him to sit. Let the colored boi sit" The man with the cane politely refuses but the other guy just wouldn't quit, he says "You don't wanna sit you think you young, boi? I guess you like Moses" ETC ETC

Now I ask you, which do think would've been worst? This guy being white saying these things or a black man saying these things? Well sorry to disappoint you but this guy was 100%..........BLACK. It's a DAMN SHAME in this day and age that this kind of slavery mentality still exists.

A BLACK man calling BLACK people colored, like they have some type of disease. I don't understand this type of Self-Hatred at all. People make the color of their skin define who they are, like being a particular shade makes them less of a person. I see this in everyday life, people who tan because they are too light, people who bleach because they are too dark, and people who avoid the sun to refrain from becoming darker. I mean IS THIS A JOKE?? When we die we all become bones, our flesh rots away and we are no longer a color. So why is so much emphasis being placed on color while we are alive? Why are black people so against one another even after slavery? Shouldn't we work harder to build each other up, so that we can regain all that was lost and then some?

I am black and I found this man to be repulsive, he is a hindrance to my existence and success. It's a shame to see a person like this spewing negativity and doubting how far someone who is of color can reach in life. I had another encounter a few years back at my job with a woman who had the same mindset as this man. The woman asked me a question about the store policy and I told her everything that needed to be known. She wasn't satisfied with my answer even though I was one of the best at my job. She turns to me and tells me "You are not a manager, never will be. Black people cannot be managers". At that time, I exploded and let her have it because how dare you as a Black woman tell someone who has the same skin tone this trash. How do you motivate your children to go to school. People like this are the reason why black kids only look forward to "copping" jordans, listening to trash, naming their babies, and making guest appearances on Maury to tell their partner they're cheating.What happened to the Martin Luther Kings, the Rosa Parks, Malcolm X's? Do they exist anymore?

Can we as people do better? Of course we can, but only if we change our mindset and support one another. I can go on and on about this subject but to sum it all up in the words of James Brown: "Say it LOUD, I'm BLACK and I'm PROUD"

Signed,

An Average and Black New Yorker

AvgNYer@gmail.com

Feature Friday: Justice for Trayvon?

Indeed I must warn you, that unlike my previous posts, this one is a bit more somber. Almost 50 days ago, on February 26th, 2012 a 17 year old young man by the name of Trayvon Martin was killed. He was followed and killed by a neighborhood watchman by the name of George Zimmerman (who happens to be white) because he looked "suspicious" wearing a hoodie and being black in a predominantly white neighborhood. Since this event occurred it has been all over the nation and world. There have been protests in many states, by angry people trying to shed light on the injustice in this case. What injustice you may ask? Believe or not Zimmerman was not arrested until April 11th, 2012 because he claimed he was protected by the "Stand Your Ground" Law (which entitles a person to defend himself if he feels threatened).

Even though this happened in Florida, there has been a lot of news coverage and also protests as well (How can we forget "The Million Hoodie March") here in New York. So while out in out in Times Square some nights ago I was plesantly surprised to run across an artist (see pic below) that was encouraging people to sign his petition and drawings of Trayvon Martin because he didn't want his memory to die.

ARTIST

People from all walks of life started stopping and signing the petition and it really shocked me to see how this one dead boy thousands of miles away touched the lives of so many people. I started feeling all warm and fuzzy inside, thinking that this world may not be as terrible a place it pretends to be. UNTIL, a woman walked up to the artist and honestly asked "Who is Trayvon Martin?". Although it was such a simple question; my eyes blogged, my jaw fell open and I thought to myself "You have GOT TO BE KIDDING ME".  We are in New York City, the city that NEVER sleeps, the city that has a news station on almost every corner, the city that reports if the wind is blowing too hard and YOU my dear lady have not heard about this case??? The artist who was more gracious than I could ever be at that point in time, politely explained what happened to Trayvon and why he was doing what he was doing. So guess what the lady does next???


A. Becomes emotional and doesn't believe such injustice still exists in America
B. Kicks herself for not being at least aware of something so monumental
C. Signs the petition and vows to inform others so more youths won't end up like Trayvon
D. Walks away stone faced without saying a word

HALL OF SHAME

If you guessed D, then you are 100% correct and you just won a big dose of disbelief and harsh reality. It's funny how people who don't take time to care about others want others to care when terrible things happen to them. She walked away with total disinterest like it was NOT her problem. Lady if that was your son, I wonder how much more you would do to keep his memory alive? And because of that dear lady I must induct you into my Hall of Shame (yes I managed to snap a quick pic of you asking your foolish question). I think it was a VERY GOOD thing I didn't manage to capture your face because you probably might become as hated as George Zimmerman himself because of your pure ignorance. Ignorance like this can only be conquered with knowledge and this knowledge can only be obtained if we truly seek it.

 We need to stop being a mindless society, we need to stop worrying about trivial things like iPhone updates, Snooki's pregnancy, who won what award and open up our minds to how REAL this world is. Zimmerman not being behind bars all this time is injustice and even if he gets to serve time justice is NOT served. The greatest injustice of all is knowing that a young man lost his life without even getting a chance to reach his true potential and that a family has lost someone due to a senseless act of violence. I am not asking you to become the next Dr. Martin Luther King Jr or do something like what this artist did; all I am asking you to do is be aware. Be aware of your words and actions and make sure everything that you do from now on will make the world a better place for our future generations. Don't let Trayvon's death be in vain but let us make his death the last.

Signed,

An Average but Concerned New Yorker

AvgNYer@gmail.com

Feature Friday: Public Transportation Dos and Donts

As a New Yorker who is constantly on the go and has little patience for traffic, we depend heavily on public transportation, whether it be bus or train. Even when the prices go up (we grumble and complain), but we still use public transportation. However being that NY is a melting pot and that everyone travels here, some people may or may not be aware of the RULES (yes I said rules) of utilizing mass transit. So to make things simpler for those who don't know, here is a simple list of  Mass Transit Dos and Donts:

DOs

1. Do Bathe before entering mass transit, matter of fact bathe before you leave home. No bodily odors allowed!!!
2. Do have your metrocard in hand when ever you try to enter mass transit, stop keeping people back
3. Do offer the elderly, disabled, or pregnant a seat (Unless you are tired, I KID LOL)
4. Do walk like you have life and not like a zombie from "Walking Dead", people have places to go
5. Do speak softly in your cellphone, keep your hood business with keke and 'em in the HOOD
6. Do keep your saltfish or ANY fish meal in its proper bag til you exit, eat it at home
7. Do cover your mouth when coughing or sneezing, no need to wash me with your germs and saliva
8. Do turn your volume down (I know your beats headphones are popping) but I don't want to listen to Nicki Minaj (I am trying to preserve my brain cells)

DONTs

1. Don't hover over me to read what I am reading (especially if it's my cellphone)
2, Don't try to squeeze into any space smaller than you, no matter your size.
3. Don't sit in front of the bus or block the train door with your elephant stroller
4. Don't sit right next to me, if there are 20 other seats open
5. Don't give us a peek of what you and your significant other do in the bedroom. YA NASTY
6. Don't fight for a seat or because someone stepped on your toe, you need personal space. Get a car NOW!!
7. Don't change your child's diapers on the bus or train especially if it's from the backend
8. Don't break your leg running after a bus or train, they WILL leave you and MTA is NOT footing your medical expenses. Let's not forget the complete embarrassment to top it off

Hope this helped. If you think I have forgotten any rules, please leave a comment containing your additions. Don't forget to spread the knowledge (print it, fb it, tweet it) so that using public transportation can be a smoother ride for us all.

Signed,

Average New Yorker

P.S. Sorry for the late post, long day at work. Next Feature Friday WILL be posted on Friday

Welcome To My Humble Abode

First and foremost, I would like to say THANK YOU so much for taking time out your hectic life to read this and I hope you enjoy.

Being a New Yorker simply means that crazy is normal and normal is crazy. If you tell a New Yorker that your stores close at 6pm so that everyone can be home in time for dinner; first you would get this look o__O then they would say you were CRAZY to live like that. However, if a New Yorker was heading to work and there was a naked bum laying down on the seat next to them, they wouldn't be fazed; they would just continue reading "Hunger Games" on their Kindle Fire. It's like we are immune to these things.

However, I have actually noticed tourists taking pictures of crazy things in New York that we take for granted. SOOOO I decided to act like a tourist, being observant to every little thing that occurred (Trying to see if I would notice these things as well). Would you believe that I discovered, New Yorkers are actually CRAZY?? I know, I know stop the presses this is breaking news. If you are a fellow New Yorker I aim to prove this abstract theory of mine with my findings. And if you are not a New Yorker, you already know we are crazy so I don't need your input. I KID, I KID. LOL

But seriously, it's like New York is the number one vacation spot for people who are a couple of eggs short of a dozen. If you say that you never saw anything way out of the norm in New York, there are only two conclusions to be drawn: 1. You are legally Blind or 2. You are ONE OF THEM!!!! (the crazies that this). LOL. That is why I am going to document with words, pictures and video this crazy world around me. Some things may be good, bad, hilarious, heart-wrenching, or uplifting; but I aim to give everyone a better look at New York through the eyes of a New Yorker.

I must say as much as I am a weirdo magnet I cannot chronicle these things alone. I need YOUR help. If you see anything that is bizarre and worth sharing, take a picture or video clip and send it to AvgNYer@gmail.com. Each Friday I will post up the pic or clip of the week. So stayed tuned and welcome to my humble abode, New York

Signed,

Average New Yorker